Rizz 202

Welcome back to rizz class. If you read my previous article, you will have an excellent basis for talking to women. Since I last wrote to you, there were some points I did not hit as much as I should have that we’ll cover here in Rizz 202.

In the first point about becoming closer to God, it was merely a blink in the epic my article was. Jesus Christ gave us the most outstanding example of how to love, like he loved the church. 1 Corinthians illustrates that for us.

“Love is patient; love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” — 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

This is a famous passage often recited at weddings and a common cliché you hear in movies. Let me start out by saying love is a choice. Despite whatever movie or TV show tells you, it is not a feeling. Feelings come and go. That’s why the more you get into the word and learn the truth of Jesus Christ, the less you rely on your feelings.

I used to believe the section above spoke solely about romantic relationships, but that could not be further from the truth. When you apply the love that is explained in 1 Corinthians, you strengthen all the relationships in your life.  

The greatest commandment is to love God with all your heart, but second is to love one another as Jesus loved us. I am not saying that this would be easy in any way. There will be days when you do not want to show the love and compassion that the Lord has shown you, but that’s when you realize it’s a choice. You chose to show that person love when they did not do the same for you because our God showed you love, even though you turned your back on him many times.

You do not know what someone is going through, so do not make assumptions about why or how they treated you. We have to show unrelenting forgiveness to our transgressors.  

I remember a time shortly after I had surgery on my arm and my mother was driving me back to college. I was texting a young lady that I had been texting for a few weeks, and I told her that I had gotten this big project done for one of my classes. She responded with some affirming phrase, like “Good job.” I turned to my mother to complain to her about how this young woman was patronizing me. If you have never met me in person, I would like to tell you that I can be a very sarcastic person. My mother looked at me and said, “Jaxon, why are you so pessimistic?”.  

I had grown up with a mentality that everyone was out to get me, and I can only rely on myself. That was the first conversation that triggered my becoming intentional in how I perceived the things people told me. If you live a life assuming that everyone is being rude, you will be very miserable.  

Something that also really helped my mindset toward this was understanding that there are no such thing as evil people — just people who make mistakes. Hurt people hurt people. The people who are the meanest, the rudest, just the downright worst are usually the people who are struggling the most. As much as you do not want to, be nice to everyone. Show everyone patience and assume the best until they give you a reason not to.  

The next point I want to address is handling yourself. I saw a video by a religious leader where he told the viewer that you should write down all the attributes you are looking for in a partner. Once you have that written down, write your name above it. Do not focus on finding Mr. or Ms. Right, become them instead. I say all that, but the enemy wants you to focus on yourself and isolate yourself. That is not the way to grow. Instead, be in communion with other believers.  

In addition, I am someone who believes that you need to handle all your trauma prior to walking into a relationship. I am also one who believes that you cannot truly be in a loving relationship unless you know the love of Christ. That means that if you are insecure because you were cheated on, dealt with some form of abuse, or whatever the cause is, take the time to fix those areas first. Ask the Lord to work in those areas, and trust in the process.  

Many people also told me that my rizz in the first article was not up to par. So here is a much better way of approaching women.  First, go up to the young lady and give her a compliment of some kind. When you see her, look her up and down to find something interesting, like a tattoo or a hat. This also shows that you take time to notice details and that you aren’t just checking her out.  

I also spoke to a couple of young ladies who have expressed that they did not find this approach to be okay because it was too sweet or too kind. If she does not appreciate this sentiment, you will be saving yourself a lot of time. If a girl cannot take a compliment, then there are some unresolved self-image issues.  

Three significant things to close with. First, women are a gift from God who should be respected, loved, and cared for. They are human beings with emotions and feelings, which sounds cliché. Second, to the women, you guys need to know your self-worth. No guy is worth giving up anything that you shouldn’t. Your happiness should not be reliant on anyone except for Jesus Christ.  

The last thing that will help both genders in this world is understanding the mindset of both. Women think very emotionally, whereas men think very logically. So if there is a problem in the relationship, men will tend to fix the issue by action, but not addressing how their partner feels about the situation. Men are fixers; that’s why it may leave your female not feeling steady.  

I heard this good point from two people who had recently gone to couples’ therapy. They said that women are always one bad argument away from breaking up, unlike men who will have a problem, resolve it, and never think about it again. Remember, when dealing with an argument, it is not you versus the person. It’s you and the person versus the problem.  

Editor’s Note: Share your reaction to Jaxon’s Rizz 202 article by commenting in the section below.