Elise Clary: A Brave Woman

Bluefield University has one of the most vital, courageous students. Elise Clary has shown herself to be a warrior these past several months.

Born in Texas into a family of missionaries, Clary lived in Uruguay for seven years before coming to live in Bluefield where she attended Graham High School. After high school, she came to Bluefield University to study business. Now a junior at BU, she is facing an unexpected journey. 

“When I found out I was pregnant, I was initially in a state of shock” Clary said. “Since that moment, my life has never been the same. I was terrified, really. The way my life was at this time, March 19 to be exact, I was lost, depressed, and searching for validation through a toxic relationship. It took a while to accept the pregnancy after I found out. I have always known that I would want to be a mom someday. I never expected it to come in such a time as this.”

As a result of the pregnancy, Clary has been dealing with many changes in her life, but it never made her give up on her goals. Today at 29 weeks pregnant, she talks about the most significant change in her life.

“Though it sounds ironic, this unplanned pregnancy brought me back to life,” Clary said. “For the last two years, I have struggled to feel any true purpose in my life. I spent countless hours crying to God that he would show me why I was going through so much pain. Because of how impactful having a baby is for anyone, it is difficult to name only one thing pregnancy has changed for me.”

Because of the challenges, Clary said she considered the idea of ​​dropping out of college and getting a full-time job.

“But then I envisioned myself walking across the stage with a cute little baby girl in my arms,” she said, “and I knew that was the example I wanted to set for the next generation. (That is) the sole reason I wake up every morning and choose to live every day with meaning.”

Her best friend Morgan Haskins agrees with this statement. She said Clary’s change is remarkable and that she has become a more responsible and happier person.

“Since she got pregnant and became a mother, Elise has been a great woman,” Haskins said. “She’s strong, responsible, happy, humorous, and always giving her best in all areas of her life. I believe many look to Elise as an example of not giving up.”

With the baby due November 23, Clary said she plans to make a lot of adjustments over the next few months.

“Because my daughter is due at the end of this semester, I will be using the Winter Break to my advantage,” Clary said. “I do not plan to come back in person during the spring (semester), but do still hope to work through online courses.”

Born into a Christian family and having a pastor and professor as her father at Bluefield University, Clary shared how it is to deal with the judgment of the people around her.

“I never really cared what other people would think of my situation,” Clary said, “mainly because I have never been the kind of person to judge someone for choosing to have a baby. I have worried about how this might change the way people treat me. Being a single mom is so demanding of a woman’s time and life, I feel that we should be applauded for our bravery rather than scrutinized for the ‘mistake’ we made.”

Clary said she is also very grateful to her teachers and friends for respecting and supporting her in the best possible way in her new phase. However, she said her most significant support and protection network comes from her family, and how they handled the situation surprised her.

“I can proudly say my biggest supporters are my parents,” Clary said. They are both educators and have devoted their lives to living for Jesus long before I was even born. An outsider might think they would be ashamed of me, leave me to figure things out on my own, and disown me. But just like Christ, they forgave me and loved me anyway. I cannot say enough good things about how my parents have supported me through this journey. While it was heartbreaking at first, they never stopped loving me, caring for me, and making me feel worthy. For this, I will always be grateful.”

In addition to being a caring mother, Clary said she hopes to accomplish other goals in the future.

“A year from now, I see myself continuing to work at a college degree,” she said. “I hope to still work at The Grind, because The Grind never stops, and I will always be a coffee addict. I also plan to be celebrating life as much as I can with my little family.”